Couples finances: Combine or keep separate? (2024)

How do you manage your finances? Do you and your partner’s wages go into a single joint bank account from which you both spend, or do you keep your money separate, each paying for your own expenses and combining it only when necessary?

I have seen various ways in which couples manage their finances. The most common is to have all or at least the majority of a couple’s finances owned jointly.

There are some historical reasons for this that date back to the era where there was one income earner, typically a husband, with the wife at home looking after the kids.

Joint finances, particularly for a young couple starting out, can also imply trust and a sense of being in it together. The idea of what’s mine is yours and what’s yours is mine – it can be a step in building a life together.

However, joint finances can be less appealing for couples coming together later in life.

Perhaps one member of the couple has significant assets while the other comes into the relationship with debts. It could also be that one partner is divorced and has ongoing child-maintenance obligations which their new partner does not wish to share.

For couples who want to keep some of their finances separate, one successful approach is to have a joint household account into which they each contribute, say, $2000 a month.

From this account, all food and other household bills are paid. Beyond the contribution into the household account, each member of the couple retains their own income and spends it as they see fit. Sometimes they might contribute to a joint holiday account, too.

There can also be good reasons for keeping just a small portion of finances separate.

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Pre-kids, my wife and I each had separate personal bank accounts and we paid $50 a week into each.

It gave us a bit of guilt-free spending money and it was nice to be able to buy things such as birthday and Christmas presents and not have it pop up on the credit card before the big day.

Joint accounts work well where the couple forms at a relatively young age with the intention of starting a family. Separate finances work best later in life and perhaps where no children are envisaged.

In either case, often some combination of joint and separate finances provides the best outcome.

However, there is no single answer that is right for everyone.

If joint bank accounts for all your finances does not sit right with you, don’t feel that you are doing something wrong, or that it is a poor reflection on the trust within your relationship.

There are plenty of good reasons why you might choose to keep your finances separate, and there are many couples with happy long-term relationships who don’t combine their incomes.

Paul Benson is a financial planner and author of Financial Autonomy